My 2013 So Far

I had a sense toward the end of last year that 2013 was going to be a great year. I didn't know what that would look like, I still don't actually, but I was open. Normally as one year comes to a close and another is about to start I take a few days to reflect on the current year and think about the new year. This time I got very sick not long after Christmas and so I wasn't in the frame of mind to think about anything let alone the new year.

I gave up on new year's resolutions a long time ago because they always seemed like a setup for failure. Then for a few years I bought into the "one word" movement for a bit, but I gave up on that too for the same reason. Instead I would get quiet at the end of the year and just listen for something and write down what I heard.

Since I didn't have time to do any of that this year, I was content to take 2013 as it came and fly by the seat of my pants. That's precisely what I started out to do, and then I heard it; one word that would shape my year - FULFILLED. There it was... but what did it mean?

I was about to find out. In January I pushed through my fear and sent my manuscript to a publisher I'd been stalking for several years and two days later, I got word that it was accepted for publication!! Then came revisions and rewrites and all the nerves that go along with putting yourself out there. Now as I type this post my book is published and available for purchase and February isn't even over yet!!!

As if that wasn't enough after 3 years of hard labor (read: school work) I got my diploma in the mail! The final piece to the puzzle that is my bachelor's in English. It was a long time coming. I left school in August of 1990 without a degree and depressed about the whole situation. I tried a few times to get back, but the timing was always off. Then one day opportunity knocked and I answered and it paid off. I am now tossing around the idea of going for my MFA sometime soon, but only time will tell..

So that's been my 2013 so far in a nutshell and we still have 10 months to go. I have a feeling this is going to be some ride! I'm excited to see what else will be "fulfilled" in the months ahead. I'm glad you're along to share it with me!

Submission

Eleven days in and already 2013 has stretched me. After five years of hemming and hawing, I finally took that last step and submitted my manuscript to a publisher for consideration...

It's funny because that was the ultimate purpose for writing this book in the first place... wasn't it? Yet I dragged my feet. As I sat there with my trembling finger poised over the submit button my mind took me back to that day when I put a period on the last sentence. I remember feeling so accomplished because I finally finished something. In the years that followed I did a lot of research about the publishing process. To be honest, I had all the information I needed to get it done within a few weeks yet I procrastinated. Why?

In a word it was FEAR... The closer I got to realizing my dream, the more fear gripped me and wouldn't let go. I started second guessing every word and questioning whether writing was truly my calling. I was waging an internal battle. I made slow progress - I had the manuscript professionally edited... twice, I had the cover designed, I purchased my ISBN numbers - all very important steps.

I'm not sure what is different about this year, but somehow my desire overcame my fear and I had to take that last step and submit it for publication. After five years of  worry, fear, self doubt and procrastination, I took a couple deep breaths,  hit "submit" and waited. It only took two days to get a reply. I am pleased to announce that Faith Lifts has been ACCEPTED FOR PUBLICATION!!!! Woo Hoo!!!! I am beyond excited!

So the purpose of this post is twofold:: One - I want to chronicle this experience so that next time I find myself in this place, I have something to draw from; and Two - I hope that my story can inspire someone else to move forward toward their own dream. It is, after all, about living the life we were born to live; the life we see in our dreams. It's the most terrifyingly fulfilling journey any of us can ever take!! Oh but what a ride!